Yes? Yes!

So, the saga continues.

I gotta say that I feel a little bad for harshing on Yes Computers in a previous post. (Maybe you want to read that one first.)

To review: I had brought an old iMac in for a memory upgrade, and after some backing and forthing, I ended up with memory adequate to support the upgrade to OS X that I had planned. I had also purchased the distribution of the latest version of OS X, and was assured that installation would go smoothly. The option was to pay labor rates to have them install it, and, hey, this is a Mac, right? It just works, right?

Okay, I'll install the OS upgrade myself.

Round about noon, with the morning's coffee comfortably ensconced in my veins, I put the first of four CDs in the beautiful Indigo. She is preening with her new luxurious allotment of RAM. She snarfs up the CD, pops up a folder window that offers a few files. One is "Install OS X." Another is "Read Me Before Installing OS X."

I am one of those peculiar people who actually likes to read documentation, and so I click on the latter. The dark blue lady apologizes, but she's unable to open the file.

No problem. I look around some more in this folder and come across another one called "Read Me Before Installing OS X.pdf."

Ah, good. PDF file. I know what those are. Double-click.

Once again with the profuse apologies.

"Is it actually possible to have a computer that was built after Carter was president that doesn't have Acrobat Reader on it?" I ask my cat. (She is helping with the installation by alternately walking on the keyboard and stretching out on top of the mouse.)

The miserable feline does not deign to respond. She jumps off the desk, bored with the whole thing, and starts trying to bite a piece of tape off of the box that the blue lady shipped in. I decide that if she's gonna choke, she's gonna choke, and set about downloading Acrobat Reader.

The Mac Internet Connection thing works flawlessly, thanks to my superior bookmarking on the other computer. I know my IP's nameserver's address in dot notation, I know the name of the SMTP server, I got this mofo. Kinda wondering about how this Internet Connect thing isn't "just working" without a whole lot of help on my part, but . . . no matter. Download Acrobat, unStuffIt, install it. Back to the Read Me file.

Hmmm . . . okay, this all looks good. My system seems to be fine. Best to use the handy Software Update menu thing to be sure that the firmware is up to snuff. Double-click. Click. Click. Click. Now we're ready to begin some serious upgrading!

Click that file icon saying "Install OS X". A really cool window pops up with a giant brushed steel X and one button, labeled "Click here to install."

Click.

You gotta know what's coming, don't you?

Yup. The CD drive grinds away for a few minutes, and then an error window pops up. With a helpful error code of "-2."

"Well," I say to the cat who has lost interest in the shipping tape and is now trying to pretend that it is okay to rub against the precariously placed coffee cup, "they did say to call if I had a problem with the installation."

Beep-beep-beep. Beep-beep-beep-beep.

"Thank you for calling Yes Computers. Please listen to this menu carefully, as our options have changed . . ."

"They all say that," I tell the cat. She is now nearly comatose on the couch.

(dah-dee-dah, dum dee dum . . .)

". . . Press 3 for tech support . . ."

Beep.

"Yes Computers. Josh speaking."

Hey! No hold music! Now I start babbling. But I soon recover, and get my point across to Josh, who then says, "Hmmm . . . I've never heard that before."

(Great.)

"Why don't you bring it down, and we'll take a look?"

(????. !!!!!!!!!!!!!.)

"Sure, I'll be right down."

I pull the plug on the beautiful blue lady, and into the mighty Passat we go. I score the most excellent parking space possible, stroll in, plop her down on the counter, and Josh and Dave come over and listen to a rehash of the symptoms.

"Okay, it's possible that the CDs were bad. Let's take a look."

(They're gonna look at right away? Too much!)

We plug things in, Josh comes over with fresh CD in hand, starts doing Mac weenie tech guy stuff to look at the firmware, or perform an alternate boot, or some such thing. He is not looking happy. (I can't believe I'm being allowed to watch.)

"There's something wrong with this CD drive, I think. I can't even hear it moving."

I kid you not: I bellow for quiet in the store.

Since this is a town filled with skinny college kids and massage therapists who never speak in a tone of voice louder than a coo, and I'm kind of a big guy with scary long hair who is wearing a big black coat, my half-kidding command actually works. Silence descends.

I get a raise of the eyebrows from Josh, like, "Why didn't I ever think of trying that?"

We (we!) try some more stuff, and it becomes clear to us (us!) that the CD drive has gone over one pothole too many. I ask about the possibility of installing the OS from an external DVD drive, and Josh says, "That should work," and being no dummy, prepares to hand it off to Dave. Then his conscience overcomes his common sense.

"Lemme just check one more thing," he says. Click. Click. Click. "Uh oh."

(Now what?)

"Now what?" I ask.

"This hard drive isn't big enough to install OS X."

I have nearly fifteen minutes' experience running Mac computers, so I decide to argue. "Whaddya mean? I checked Apple's site, and they say that I need 3 gigs of hard disk space to do the install, 4 gigs if I want to install the developer tools. I've got over five!"

Josh explains that this is all true, but that OS X needs 10 gigs of space for temp files during the actual installation process. He proceeds to show me that I have an 8-gig hard drive. I don't know how to make a Mac show the size of its hard disk drive, so I try to hide how I'm impressed.

I plunge ahead: "Can't you use an external hard drive for the temp space?"

A look of patience mixed with pity. "No."

(Crap.) "OK. What are my options for a new hard drive?"

We settle on a good price for a new 40 GB hard drive, installed for free. And this time, they'll do the OS upgrade, also for free. "Should be ready tomorrow. We'll give you a call."

Cool.

I walk out and go around the corner to visit my friend Cindy, as long as I'm downtown, and she runs a framing shop, and I have something that needs framing. Because she's my friend.

After a nice hour hanging out in the friendly confines of Off The Wall, I get conscious of my parking meter status and say good-bye.

Oh, wait. Just thought of something. Do these guys know that I want the developer tools installed when they put the new OS on? I decide to swing back by Yes.

I walk into the service department like I own the place. The people up front are evidently still quaking from my earlier polite request that everyone shut up, and no one challenges me.

Josh and Dave are working away. They look up. "Hi!" I say. "Is it ready yet?" Just kidding, of course. Then I take a closer look. Dave is actually sitting in front of my machine. (Holy shit!)

He looks up. "Well, I put the new hard drive in, but the machine is not seeing the external DVD drive. I can't do the installation."

(Now I'm all mixed up. These guys actually put the hard drive in already, and started in on the installation. In an hour?)

We go back and forth, and they are not looking at all happy. They have been talking about it, and have concluded that the CD drive is not only broken all by itself, but that it's so badly broken that it's causing a conflict with the external drive. Dave is happy to confirm that the DVD drive works when plugged into another machine.

"So, where are we? What are my options now?" I'm thinking, I've bought this RAM upgrade, and this new OS distribution, and even a new hard drive, and now -- nothing works. Well, the new RAM and the new hard drive work, but I can't get OS X onto this fresh hardware.

"Well, I hate to have to say this to anyone . . .," starts Josh.

"But there comes a point when it's just not worth trying to upgrade an old machine, right?" I finish. He nods, sorrowfully.

However, they're not out of options yet. They have a used PowerMac for sale -- cheap. Only $250. It already has a 40-gig hard drive on it, and a DVD drive, and 512 MB of RAM. It needs only a monitor, a keyboard and a mouse. I can use the keyboard and mouse from the iMac, right? Right. How about using the iMac (a completely self-enclosed computer and monitor) as the monitor? No. Everyone asks that. Sorry. Won't work. They point out that the PowerMac will work with any monitor, however, and . . .Hey! I have an unused monitor at home! They offer to pull the new memory out of my old iMAC, reinstall the old memory, pull the new hard drive and reinstall the old one, all for free. The new memory can be exchanged, for free, for an additional 512 MB in the PowerMac, and the old hard drive can be returned, also for free.

I say, "Cool!" and go home to get the old monitor. I plug it into my PC to make sure that it still works. It does. I head back downtown. This time, I have to park like nine miles away, of course.

I walk in. They already have everything uninstalled, installed, and reinstalled. I've been gone maybe twenty-five minutes. We plug my monitor into the PowerMac. Works. There's the 1 GB of RAM, there's the 40 GB hard drive. Check. I fire up the iMac. (I can't believe I'm in a service area, being allowed to plug things in and turn them on. Not only that, I've been back here so long that other customers are starting to ask me questions. Which I answer. Heh heh.) The iMac boots -- there she is, back to her original configuration state. Dave pulls the PowerMac apart, to show me where everything went. (Free lessons from hardware guys!!!)

We walk to the cashier. I pay for my new (used) computer, retrieve my old (new (used)) computer and monitor, my OS X distribution, my keyboard, mouse, and various and sundry cables and disks, and we pile them onto the counter. I load it all back into the Passat, and head for home.

One way of looking at this is that I spent $650 on a free computer, out of which I ended up with a working keyboard.

Another way of looking at it is that I spent $650 and received in return: two pretty good computers, short only a keyboard and a mouse, a RAM upgrade for the better (albeit uglier) machine, a copy of the latest and greatest operating system, useful employment for a monitor that was just taking up space, and an entirely rewarding and educational experience with two hardware guys.

Throughout the early part of today was paranoia: what if these guys read my flames of them on this blog? Now, I hope they do, because I just want to say: thanks, Josh and Dave.

And now, I have only one problem remaining.

When you swear off the PC world, and fall in love with a beautiful Indigo, how do you explain to her about a teal computer?

My cat just yawned.